belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I think my fart just growled at me.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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