she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Randomize
