Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Randomize
