Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
