We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
