I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize