we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Randomize
