we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Randomize
