I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Randomize
