No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
