Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
