you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Those nachos came to me in a dream
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
