Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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