Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Randomize
