in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
