found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
