great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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