Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I looked at my own cervix.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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