Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
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