my room smells like sperm. sweet.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
3pm strippers are depressing
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
