so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I just forgot I was standing up.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
