So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
