I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
