I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
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