On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
