If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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