Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Randomize
