Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
