sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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