...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
