just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
