I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
