I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
