Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Randomize
