How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
