Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
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