I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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