i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize