I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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