He kissed a someone with a penis
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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