I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Randomize
