At least make sure they are 18
Why
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize