I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Little spoons don't ask big questions
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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