Farmville is her only friend.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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