haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
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