Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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