I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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