I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Randomize
