not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize