btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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