YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize
