I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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